No News is Good News
right!?
Well, I have to admit since resuming treatment, the last two weeks of healing sessions have gone pretty smoothly and I don’t have much to report there (which is a good thing!). I am now officially over the halfway point in my treatment plan, I’ve completed 9 sessions and have 7 to go! Tim has been a trooper and has been at my side for the last two weeks. I tolerate this one medicine that I’m getting very well so I’ve also had minimal side effects. Mainly just fatigue and hot flashes, so I can’t complain.
My biggest thing right now is dealing with isolation. I’ve missed out on a lot of events and opportunities to be with people because there is both the flu and covid going around right now. I’m home alone all day and honestly at this point feel more comfortable running a quick errand (with a mask on) than hanging out with people. It’s hard not to be able to kiss your husband (because he’s around so many sick people at work) or see your friends. I’ve said no to a holiday pajama party, bunco, a fun porch pot event that I signed up with friends, brunch at the country club, and many upcoming events in the next few weeks with concerns of getting sick.
The biggest thing I’ve had to say “no” to is our annual trip to Mazatlán. Tim and I usually go to Mexico with the Bortners for a week after Christmas and this is the first year since 2013 that we will not be going. Tim and I are super bummed as it’s always something so fun to look forward to, but with how much I’ve had to rely on the hospital system we’ve decided that it wouldn’t be ideal to have to go to the hospital in a foreign country where they cannot easily access my records or speak with my doctors. Plus, I do not want to be on an airplane right now.
I REALLY want to avoid getting sick right now for two reasons.
Plain and simple - I don’t want to be sick. I’ve already spent enough time not feeling good and in and out of the hospital. I don’t want to go back there because I decided to go to a party or be around people, it’s not worth it. Plus, something that takes a normal person a few days to fight could take me weeks.
If I get covid, I cannot get treatment for 20 days from the onset of symptoms. My healing plan is already 5 weeks behind. It’s normal to have a few weeks of setbacks or weeks you don’t qualify for treatment, but I’ve had a month of them and I don’t need another 20 days. It’s really important to keep my treatment plan on schedule as much as possible so I can wrap up in late February/Early March.
So what’s best is that I stay home right now to avoid the yucky stuff going around.
When I am isolated it’s easy to get sad and down about things, so I’ve been dealing with those emotions. Tim is so great for helping me reframe things. This past week I was upset about my thyroid and adrenal glands not working on their own ever again (that’s what Endocrinologists told me at least) and he said, “Well guess what? You have 196 other things that do work in your body, what about those?” Thanks, hubby for showing me some tough love when I need it most.
It’s true, especially when you go to the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, which I did this past week for an Endocrinology appointment, you see EVERYTHING. You see people who cannot walk, who cannot talk, who cannot see. You see people with many things that don’t work, that are much more severe and life-altering. This helps to put things in perspective. I take some medicine a few times a day and I can manage my thyroid and adrenal glands, but there isn’t a magic pill for many of these people. Being sick is a very emotional journey and trust me, you find a lot of things to be grateful for. The hard and dark days allow you to fully appreciate the good days that come.
At this point, I feel like I’ve had every part of my body looked at with a fine toothcomb. When you do find bad cells in one part of your body they are very careful and overconcerned with looking at everything else, which I appreciate. But it’s also nerve-wracking getting these scans because you’re just scared something else is going to be found. To date, I’ve had a brain MRI, chest CT, multiple breast mammograms and ultrasounds, ultrasounds on my lymph nodes in my right armpit, breast MRI, full body PET scan, abdominal MRI, extensive eye exam, vaginal ultrasound, plus when they did the surgery on my right ovary they looked around at the other nearby organs with a camera as well.
I’ve had a full workup and am happy to report everything else is healthy, now I’ve just gotta believe my breast is healthy too!
So, what have I been doing to keep myself busy?
I’ve decorated my whole house for Christmas
Made a DIY porch pot
Christmas shopping for family
Walking on the treadmill in my gym for 30 minutes a day while watching animal documentaries
Making videos on TikTok
Word searches
Drinking hot cocoa and watching movies
Working with my friend Jessi on merch for Brave Beautiful Boobies (stay tuned!)
One thing that I love that helps pass the time and also fulfills my need to connect with people is talking with friends either via Zoom or on the phone, so I’d love to open the doors to connect with you in the upcoming weeks. I’ve opened a virtual calendar to sign up for time slots where we can chat and catch up! Click the link below and you’ll be redirected to a calendar with my availability:
Looking forward to chatting and reconnecting with you, you have no idea how much it will brighten my day 🙂
Regarding my healing, I do ask for prayers. I originally started on a drug protocol of three drugs. Due to the severe drug reaction and the fact that the immunotherapy drug shut down my liver (temporarily), thyroid, and adrenal glands, I am now on a treatment plan of only one drug for the next few weeks until I transition to the second part of my treatment plan with different medicines. The prayers are that this one drug is still just as powerful and continues to shrink what is left of the “thing” in my right breast. I will have another ultrasound in a few weeks just to confirm that it’s doing its job to get some reassurance. Until then, prayers are welcomed!
I will meet with my Oncologist again in two weeks and then we will decide if I can be rechallenged with the immunotherapy, it may not be in the cards per prior discussions I’ve had. We’ve just gotta weigh the pros and cons. Making these decisions that directly impact my health and livelihood are oh so difficult. But I lean into the experts and my intuition to ensure I’m making the decisions that are the best for me.
Until then I hope to continue with smooth healing sessions and pray for a safe and healthy Christmas ahead!
Xo, Breanna
